The Big Stink

Stinky!

First, we extend warm, grand, hugging thanks to everyone who left comments and wrote us personal emails. Also, for everyone who read and didn't comment, thanks less immensely, but no less grandly. Reading your sweet or witty or interesting or downright confusing words makes us feel so happy and connected to our friends, loved ones and all humankind. Please keep your sweet words coming, and we promise to do something nice for you at some point.

If ever there was a stinky, rotting armpit of the world, its Fresno, California. If there was ever a glorious, emanating epicenter of love and warmth, its Kim when she wakes up in the morning. If ever there is a fairly normal city that smells like stink bombs and has thousands of sulphuric geysers and charges exorbitant fees for internet access but offers wild and unique adventures, it is Rotorua, New Zealand: Land of Touristy, Adventurous Sulphuric Geyser Land.

I haven't done my research, but it seems that all the natural wonders are privately owned by tourist-driven pirates with expensive brochures, ethics-less graphic designers and large, persuasive signs. But in this highly competitive niche of boiling sulphur and thousands of eager Asian tourists, true value must prevail. When we finally caved in and paid "Hell's Gate" $80 apiece to see the "thermal wonderland followed by private mudbaths and sulphur soak", I must say, it was well worth it.

We flopped out of Hell, like half-eaten jelly beans. It was awesome. We had not an ounce of stress or energy left, because satan had eaten it all, and it felt oh so good.

Before Hell, we checked out "Zorbing", which was actually a big reason we wanted to come to Rotorua, and a reason we were, in general, excited. Zorbing, according to the hype and awesome promotional poster art, entails going inside a 10 foot tall inflated bouncy sphere and being pushed down a large, grassy hill. There are two options, dry and wet. The wet one, they pour warm water into your zorb for you to slosh around with. Either way, you, the "Zorbinaut" become some extreme-sport demigod, the envy of all mortal beings, a master of adrenaline-junkies, and a hero for all time.

In reality, its all quite contrived. The hill is only about 70 yards high, and the entire zorb ride takes about 6 seconds. You bounce around in a dirty ball while a dozen bored-looking people stare at you, and when you finally flop out of the zorb, the staff photographer runs over to you and makes you jump in the air and yell "Zorb!". All this for only $45 per ride.

It would have made a great story to say we were awesome Zorbinauts, but in reality, we became hardcore mountain bikers instead. WAY more awesome, and we've got toned quadraceps to show for it. We found Ed who owns Planet Bike, and for a reasonable $35 for 2 hours, we headed off into the bush. This area of NZ wilderness has many singletrack mountain bike trails carved out specifically for mountain biking, of all difficulty levels. We ended up raging for 3 hours through some gorgeous wilderness, speeding around curves and generally sweating and grunting like true athletes. Kim kept exclaiming "Mountain biking is my favourite", and Dan agreed. It was a major highlight of the trip. Travel tip: skip zorbing, go biking.

Our campsite has 3 hot spring pools, in which we soaked even more . . . but this seems like a good place to stop. We're going to debate what to do now. We may drive 3 extra hours to go rapelling through caves to see glowworms and go blackwater rafting . . . or we may go to wine country, take it easy, eat some olives and sample the fruits of the country. You'll have to link back here to find out. . .

Love,

Dan&Kim

Kat posted on 2007-12-17 at 12:04 pm

Hi Guys! So sorry I've not kept in touch. I think of you two all the time. Your pictures, words, and videos always make me smile. I love being in the snow with my family but I miss you guys and our little games in the desert. I'm so happy that your trip has been so effin' fantastic (or else yer doing a damn good job making it look that way!).

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dylan posted on 2007-09-15 at 9:49 am

Wowsers...just found the danberly site...Everything looks simply spectacular...I have no problem with the phrase "when in new zealand, prune kiwis", it seems like the natural thing to do. Kim and the incredible dancing chicken actually caused a fall out of chair episode here. Keep doin the good and smilin the lots and such as... peace (but not for superfluous roosters apparently:)

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Jaclyn posted on 2007-09-05 at 8:49 pm

Hey Kim and Dan! Just to let you know this is such a fabulous idea... You two are my heros. I'm hooked! It's a 100 times better than the real world. Peace, Jaclyn from WF's.

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David posted on 2007-08-21 at 11:44 am

That's so funny that the Zorb is only a few seconds per ride. I've seen pics of that before and they also turned it into a game on American gladiators too...What a croc! http://youtube.com/watch?v=ugrZyaH1q44&mode=related&search= Rotorua reminds me of The Bog of Eternal Stench from the Movie Labyrinth with David Bowie. It not only smells bad, but will taint anything it touches. I hope you kept your hands to yourselves there. http://youtube.com/watch?v=2TY8T9iTUxc

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Auntie posted on 2007-08-14 at 5:52 pm

Okay, now I'm exhausted, my quads hurt and all I did was work today. Got to go home to watch the video, can't wait. You've only been gone a couple of weeks and you've done more than most people do in a year. Love the Danberly reports. Thank you for keeping up with them and including us all. Love to you both. XXXOOOXXXOOO

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min posted on 2007-08-13 at 5:28 pm

AWESOME!

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Becky & Sharri posted on 2007-08-12 at 10:02 pm

we love watching the videos together of the two of you--it feels as if we're there, lurking behind geysers and trees watching you! looking forward to more virtual adventures. lots of love, becky & sharri

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nash! posted on 2007-08-12 at 8:23 pm

you'd think after you'd become a zorbinaut you'd have the opportunity to never pay for anything again in nz, but i suppose being a zorbinaut doesn't have the same celebrity appeal as, say, tourist. alas.

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kristin "maloo" kerins posted on 2007-08-12 at 6:38 pm

DKNZ, so i finally caught up with your site..!i kim we've never met, but you're lovely and when i watch the videos i feel like i am hanging out with you and dan and its laughing, and silly and sweet. with a kick of something. like a fresh delicious sandwich, with a side of chicken chips. i enjoy peering in to your world...tadpoles & turtles,distant shores,exhilaration,muck, and dead snail recon missions. dan when i watch the videos and see the pics i am so happy you met this girl and ended up wherever you are. (i, personally, hope you went with the caves o' glow worms, but thats just me. and what is blackwater rafting? sounds ominous. is it near hell?) anyway.ok. xo luv yous ox. ~kristin~ .yous=sweets.

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Mom posted on 2007-08-12 at 2:13 am

I decided to comment for a (grand hugging thanks) WOW!!!Enjoying the pictures and the video very much.I make sure at least once a day check for the updates. It's wonderful to here you both laughing and having a great time. Be safe.With love Mom. xoxoxoxoxox

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James Burgin posted on 2007-08-11 at 11:27 pm

HI KIm and Dan Looks like you are having an awesome time - your smiles seem more relaxed and wider than I ever recall! Love the photos and videos - thanks for sharing all your heart with your fanboys and girls back home. Not sure if you got my first post or not - can't see it - so anyway, when you get back to Auckland have a latte for me in Vulcan lane - where the uber design and groove kids hang - you'll feel right at home and wonder 'why Phoenix?'. Happy trails, James

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